Kabit Confessions.

I tremble in anticipation. The butterflies in my stomach flutter restlessly. I could feel my insides turn into an ugly mess of quivering jelly. I could barely sit still, keep on squirming in my seat. Miniature beads of sweat begin forming on my forehead. I feel like an ice cube melting under the sun every time you glance at me, smile at me, laugh with me, talk to me and touch me. At this very moment, you are the center of my universe.

You beckon and, being the obedient girl that I am, I follow you… mute, without words, without questions, without hesitations. As we come close, I could feel the chemistry, the tension, and the unspoken longing between us. I drown in your eyes, become intoxicated by your smell, mesmerized by your boyish smile and become paralyzed by your touch and caresses. At this very moment, I am your goddess and you are my god.

You draw near and I could feel your heart breath upon my skin, and as our lips met, I hold my breath, savoring every millisecond. The kiss was better than I imagined… it was beyond my wildest dreams. I could feel the urgency of your hands on me. With every cell in my body burning with desire, I murmur your name… imploring you to release me. I surrender and abandon all my inhibitions and give myself entirely to you. We have reached the point of no return. Paradise was within our grasp. You and me. Together. At this very moment, we become one.

After everything that had been said and done, I sit there quietly. Thinking, contemplating and letting it all sink in. you give me a kiss and I give you a smile, trying to conceal the myriad of emotions that are clouding my heart. I could feel myself burn, not with desire, but with inexplicable longing, sadness and shame. And as you walk away, my heart shatters into pieces. My mouth is shut but my soul is screaming. You showed me heaven on earth. And I imagine the endless possibilities of having you in my life. Lucky her. I wish I could turn back time, return to the moment we became one. Because at that very moment, you were mine.

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